For most of my life I have been worried about money.

When I was a kid and my parents got divorced my mom took on a few jobs to make ends meet. I distinctly remember her walking into my bedroom and telling me that she was going to have to file for bankruptcy(which she never had to do). For an adult this was a legal way to stave off your creditors, but for me, as a kid this meant we were broke.

Circumstances like that set off a fear of not having the means to make ends meet.

While on vacation last week I found myself feeling a myriad of emotions surrounding the cost of the trip. The emotions ranged from guilt to worry to depression. Keep in mind Anna and I had planned to take the trip, and were paying cash.

Nevertheless, I found myself haunted by these feelings.

During the trip a friend of mine shared the devotional  by Andy Stanley: Be Rich. While reading through the devotion I found myself convicted by my views on money in a way that was foreign to me, and in a light I haven’t heard discussed much.

What was revealed to me is that over the past few years is that I had replaced my reliance on the Father for reliance on financial security and essentially made money my god.

Not in a materialistic way, or in a covetous way (which is typically how I hear it discussed) or even in a greedy way,  but I had quietly replaced  the trust and hope that only God provides for the false sense of security that money provides, and my anxiety and guilt that I have carried since I was a child found its way into my life in a way I had never known.

I always would have said I trusted in God and had my faith in him during bad times and times of trouble. I, oddly enough, found it easier to trust God during time of struggle. But today, I have an income and I don’t feel the same daily financial struggles that I had earlier in life, but I have found myself un-trusting in a new way.

So I wonder if there are any of you that share my experience. I wonder if you have been trusting the god of money.

The deception of the world is that money provides stability, but the Truth was revealed to me in the parable about the Rich man and his barns is that all of this is out of our control.

16 And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest. 17 He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’

18 “Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain. 19 And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’

20 “But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’

21 “This is how it will be with whoever stores up things for themselves but is not rich toward God.”

What a deception the world has today that if we work hard enough or save well enough we can achieve financial security. The reality is that just like the farmer relies on the rain or the weather to yield a good crop all we are given comes from the Father.

So the challenge to myself, and you is not to Tithe more, or spend less. I would say I am a giver and a saver.

The Challenge is

• Challenge your fears: Are they really rooted in a lack of faith and trust in God?
• Be a good steward: Recognize that just like the farmer in the parable all things can come to an end in a flash.
• Ask for wisdom: What are those other areas of your life, like mine, that sin is hiding?

I am so grateful for the freedom and truth found in these scriptures and that the teaching of Jesus are alive today just as they were 2,000 years ago.

What do you struggle with in your faith? How have you been set free?